Kevin placed the box of crayons in the middle of the circle. He’d barely pulled his hand away before 8 smaller ones rushed in to grab their favorite. But Kevin deftly removed a purple crayon just for Chesney. Placing the purple crayon on her paper, Chesney looked up and smiled.

Kevin hasn’t led his group for long. If you were to ask him to rate himself as a Small Group Leader, he wouldn’t rank himself very high. But what he doesn’t know is that his skill as a SGL has less to do with the quality of his lesson delivery and more to do with the personal touches he already delivers to his few.

In the small time he’s been a SGL, he’s learned that Chesney loves the color purple. A preference that isn’t hard to notice given her purple shoes, purple dress, accessorized best with a purple sparkle purse and purple polka dot nail polish. Chesney loves purple. Her SGL noticed.

This small act transformed a simple activity and made a personal connection with Chesney.

This small act spoke a simple message to Chesney, “What you love matters to me.”

Creating a safe place for your few can be as simple as knowing their preferences and meeting them in the smallest of ways. Fostering a space where kids can be who they are… purple fingernail polish and all.

What do you already do just because you know your few? How do you see these acts increase your connection with each child? Is there a next step and how can you take it?


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Gina is the Children’s Pastor at Faith Promise Church in Knoxville, Tennessee. Gina is driven by the idea of equipping, encouraging & empowering parents for the journey of teaching their kids to love and be loved by Jesus. Based upon her experience as a mom, she identifies with the everyday challenges of parenting. Gina and her husband, Kyle, have three kids, Keegan, Josie and Connor.

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